The Complete Guide to Chicken Math.

Elcomwi (Welcome) Ladies and Gentlemen. Today we shall be discussing a greatly debated topic: Chicken Math. This is what makes 5 hens turn into 50 hens. Here is a crazy chicken lady's guide to chicken math.

P.S. In case you're wondering why this post's script size is 18, as opposed to the normal 15 (for reference) it is because my eyesight is slowly deteriorating despite my young age.

One chicken counts as 1 chicken... with a few exceptions.

This rule is very clear, one chicken counts as a chicken in your flock. But there are many ways of cheating this rule, as listed below.

1. The first layer of each color egg does not count. This is because you really must have eggs of every color. Different shades of colors should also count, as they are not of the same RBG code. Some would say that, since white eggs have no pigment in them, they would not apply for this. But as white is definitely a different RBG code, there is no reason why these would not apply.

2. The first chicken of each breed does not count. Similar reasons to the rule above, have proved this to be true. Golden Comets and Rhode Island Reds might look almost the same, but they are two very different breeds. Bantam versions also count for this, as a bantam Brahma is not the same as a regular sized Brahma, but we will go into more detail on that later. Barnyard mix chickens DO NOT apply for this, as they are not a true breed, and so each mix will be considered their own special breed.

3. Bantams and Silkies count as 1/2 chicken. This goes without much comment, as silkie/bantam chicks are half the size of a regular chicken, take up half the space, and eat half the food. Additionally, when you do not have whole numbers in your flock, ALWAYS round up or down to the next whole number. If you have less than 15 chickens, round up because it is easy to count to 15 chickens. If the number of chickens is above 15, round down. It gives you space for more chickens!

4. Similarly, any chicken 9 or more pounds is considered 2 chickens. This is because they take up twice the space, and twice the food. Thankfully, this can be counter-balanced by rules 6, 8, and 10.

5. Non-laying hens count as 2x chickens, because they are eating the food of one hen, but not giving you any food in return. This rule, like number 4, can also be counteracted by 6, 8, and 10.

6. Gifted and/or Rescued chickens DO NOT COUNT! This is because gifted chickens happen so rarely, they are celebrated, not counted. Rescued chickens were taken in by you, and it is your civic duty to take care of them. Not something you planned.

7. Every third rooster does not count. Roosters tend to get killed off quickly and/or get turned into $0up, so we must keep our numbers up. You might want to make sure your collection doesn't harm the hens, so Bachelor Pads are great.

8. Named chickens do not count towards your flock size. This is because, like your own child, you cannot get rid of them simply because they don't give you something in return for the food they consume. And yes, a named chicken can be compared to your child, because they are now part of the family.

9. Non-Chickens DO NOT COUNT towards your flock of chickens, but to their own flock of XYZ. The same rules of Chicken Math will apply to them as well though.

10. It is extremely sad when one or more of your prized flock is predated; but can you really blame the predators as chickens just taste so darn good? The good news is, chickens are generally readily available for replacement. A predated chicken replacement only counts as ½ of a flock count because one is a replacement and another could get predated and we need to have backups as insurance.

I hope you enjoyed this little article as much as me and Baakaaawk enjoyed writing it! Have a fabulous, feathery day!

Effie River, and Baakaaawk.